


thank the stars

by fifteen_half



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Gen, Na Jaemin-centric, but it's in Jisung's POV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-30
Updated: 2018-10-30
Packaged: 2019-08-10 22:39:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16463717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fifteen_half/pseuds/fifteen_half
Summary: When Jaemin returns from Vietnam, he becomes closer to Siwon.Jisung is grateful at first, because Jaemin's attention has been steered away from him... that is, until he starts missing the elder boy's affections.





	thank the stars

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this in under four hours so if it's confusing, sorry!
> 
> i really liked seeing siwon and jaemin together, so i started writing. it wasn't supposed to be like this tho hahahahaha it wasn't even supposed to be in jisung's pov!
> 
> in any case, please enjoy and let me know your thoughts!

When Jaemin comes back from Vietnam, something changes.

For one, he becomes closer to Siwon. Both of them had spent two whole days together after all, in a foreign country to boot. Except in their case, the closeness is a bit different from the usual _sunbae-hoobae_ relationship, or the type of closeness from being in the same company. In their case, they become close because they realize they share and put importance over the same values—charity, volunteer work, being involved in projects whose aim is to make the world a better place to live in.

Of course, other members from both groups put importance in this too. But both Jaemin and Siwon actively seek out to be part of engagements with such an impact. Both of them have plenty of experience doing such work as well and so both of them have a lot of stories to tell.

So when Jaemin returns, he goes through his usual routine: cooing over the younger members, smothering the 00line and Mark with hugs and kisses, getting clingy with the hyungs…

But then it stops there. 

Gone is the constant cooing. Gone are the random back hugs and squishing of cheeks. Gone are the moments when the ex-pink haired boy would worm his way into his members’ personal spaces and annoy them as a form of trying to cheer them up.

Instead, he’s on his phone a lot. During breaks, instead of spending pent up energy from all his sugar intake on the members, he goes straight to his phone, sits on a corner and just… stays there. He’s constantly giggling though, and he’s always smiling at whatever it is he’s reading or at whomever it is he’s speaking to. It’s different, but he’s fine. Jaemin looks happy, very much so, but the change had been strange to Jisung.

For a while back then, he’d had thoughts of asking his hyung what was wrong… but then decides against it anyway. He wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth! If his overly affectionate hyung finally decides to heed his wishes and leave his cheeks alone, then so be it! He thanked his lucky stars then goes on as usual and forgets about it.

Except he couldn’t exactly forget.

A week passes without Jaemin’s usually overbearing presence and Jisung thinks he’s about to go insane.

Whenever he says something stupid for laughs, he expects Jaemin to come and coo at him, to pinch his cheeks and hype him up. He actually waits for the elder boy to come a couple of times, but then he remembers Jaemin isn’t beside him and instead is focused on his phone, chatting with whoever it is. Whenever he feels particularly mischievous and thinks it’s a good idea to bother the hyungs, Jaemin would usually be there to ease the annoyance directed at him with a laugh and a loud declaration that Jisung was only being cute, that he should be forgiven, that there was no need for revenge. But now Jaemin isn’t there. Now Jisung has to fend for himself.

And it isn’t just Jisung, too.

He notices how Jeno keeps on glancing at Jaemin with a confused frown on his face. Renjun actually sits beside the amber haired boy and tries to get him to leave his phone but to no avail. Haechan had tried to be annoying, because Jaemin was usually his very willing partner in crime, but Jaemin had just waved him off with a smile.

It’s when Chenle asks why Jaemin is so obsessed with his phone lately that Jisung realizes that maybe… maybe it’s not actually the phone’s fault.

His hyung has always been a person with a big heart. He’s even mentioned it in radio before—how Jaemin just  _loves_ people. It’s like he’s inherently inclined to take care of others. When they were younger, it was Jaemin who had taken him under his wing, even without prompting. It was Jaemin who first talked to Renjun when he came; the one who made sure the Chinese boy was comfortable.

It’s one of the traits Jisung loves about his hyung.

But it’s also the reason why Jaemin could get a little too overbearing—both in action, and in words.

Because he wants to make sure you understood properly, Jaemin tends to explain every single thing in detail. It’s fine if the topic is something they’re interested in. But most of the time it’s not, and so more often than not, they all just tend to… lose focus.

Jaemin never really minded though.

So when Chenle gets up to annoy Mark without so much as a by your leave, Jaemin just goes back to his phone, even when he’s still in the middle of explaining how he and Siwon hyung have a lot of things in common which is why he’s been on the phone so much these days. Jisung knows that Jaemin will be visiting Siwon on their day off. He also knows that Jaemin will be going with the elder man for another UNICEF engagement soon.

And though he will deny it until the day he takes his last breath, Jisung was feeling a little bit, just a _tiiiiny_ little bit, jealous towards Siwon.

Jaemin is _theirs_.

The elder man has his own members to fawn over. He shouldn’t be taking Jaemin!

Sure, they haven’t exactly been taking care of Jaemin, but still!

People can change.

Especially now that he’s realized what was wrong.

Jaemin just gives _and gives and gives_ , and expects so little in return. Words have always been enough for him.

But the words Jaemin wanted to hear the most, were words none of them could say without cringing.

 _I love you_.

I love you.

Jisung couldn’t even tell that to his own parents, much less a friend.

So Jaemin spending more time on the phone talking with Siwon? Jisung gets it now.

People get tired too. How many times have they left Jaemin as he spoke? How many times have they rejected his affection? Siwon has always been an affectionate person, someone who is able to freely express his thoughts and emotions. Just the type of person Jaemin needs, who probably tells him he deserves all the love in the world because he does.

He does.

Jisung doesn’t want to lose Jaemin. Not now. Not again.

So Jisung steels his resolve and sits stiffly beside the elder boy.

Bumping his shoulder against Jaemin’s, Jisung tries to casually ask, “Still talking to Siwon sunbaenim?”

Jaemin bumps Jisung right back, childish as always, then answers, “Nope,” he shows his phone to Jisung and yeah, he isn’t. He’s just playing some game.

“Hyung.”

“Yeah, Jisung ah?”

“I… uh. Hyung… Hyung, you know that uh,” he falters, unable to get the words out.

But Jaemin just smiles fondly at him, always amused at whatever he does. He even puts down his phone mid-game, something Jisung has never done for him, just to give him his full attention.

“What is it? You know you can tell hyung anything, right? Do you want to leave the room? Go somewhere private? Do you—,”

“It’s not that!” Jisung hurriedly interrupts, because he doesn’t want to get Jaemin too worked up over him. This isn’t about Jisung, after all. This is about _Jaemin_.

So he continues, “It’s nothing like that, hyung.”

“Then what is it?” Jaemin asks, still concerned.

It makes Jisung laugh, because it is just so very Jaemin. Leaning against the elder boy’s shoulder, Jisung looks at his members goofing around during break and says,

“Hyung, you know we love you, right?”

Jisung doesn’t see it, but he does feel Jaemin turning to look at him.

“We’re not as brave as you are, to say it sincerely every day. But you know that we do, right? Love you?”

At this point, Jisung’s face has gotten so warm he could probably fry an egg over it. So when Jaemin doesn’t say anything for a while, Jisung was ready to bolt out of the room and hide until break time was over. But just as he was about to leave, he feels Jaemin’s arms snake around his waist in a loose embrace. Jaemin rests his head against Jisung’s back and says, softly, sincerely, “Thank you, Jisung ah.”

Jisung smiles.

And because they’ve always had this telepathy this going on, Jeno comes bounding over, throwing his own arms around Jaemin.

Jeno doesn’t say anything, but he does hold on to Jaemin tightly, as if afraid he’d disappear.

One by one they come. Renjun, then Mark, then Chenle and Donghyuck, until they’re all one big pile at the corner of the practice room.

The hyungs are all laughing at them, but they all ruffle their hairs in fond amusement. If they linger a little longer on Jaemin, if a few of them cup his cheeks with a smile, no one says a thing. But Jaemin understands anyway, and that is what is important.

 

When the next break comes, Jaemin keeps his phone in his pocket. Then he chases Jisung around with a huge smile on his face.

Jisung whines, as usual, but he thanks his lucky stars anyway. Because although he still finds it difficult to accept Jaemin's affections, he is still so very grateful for having the elder boy in life.


End file.
